Said I would only write if something exciting happened. Well Mom aspirated today which means food went down the wrong pipe. She is fine, but I was there towards the end of the debacle which resulted in a coughing fit, headache and barf-o-rama. Then she was beat and went to bed. We (family/friends) are not allowed to feed her anymore, just for right now. Only nurses/speech until she gets stronger and better. Minor setback – no biggie. I went into VM for the medical records today. They are pulling out all of the stunts to not give them to me. Now my written faxed consent (I’ve been faxing for 3 days) wasn’t enough, had to fill out another form and the bottom line is, I still don’t have them. AND I just got a $1,300 bill for Moms medication while she was there that they didn’t submit to insurance. 😑 I didn’t want to take that place out until now. If we have anything against them, I hope to take it all the way. I have had enough of there crapola. Can’t wait to get that report.

But while I was tossing and turning last night, just wanted to pass a few thoughts about what I’ve learned the past 3 months – especially for people my age!

We aren’t kids anymore, most of us have kids! I guess it’s time to think about getting old. What that’s going to look like. Write those wills, POA’s, living wills and look at that life insurance policy if you haven’t already. All that depressing stuff you saved for later. We have to still too.

That means our parents are very old πŸ˜‰ Have a conversation about them over the holidays. Especially if they are divorced. Find out if they have there stuff in order. Who is there POA. Where are those safe deposit box keys. Whatever you think you may need to know ‘someday’ because that day may be sooner than you think. (Sorry if all doomish).

Get a copy of your insurance policy from your employer ASAP.

Get involved in politics! Our healthcare system is bullshit! Learn, vote, get involved, speak up! I’m guilty of this too. Not my problem, till it is.

Since the world kinda sucks for the middle class, either be really rich and pay for your own care or really poor and have it paid for you. LOL. Just kidding…sorta. If you’re in the middle and want to keep your stuff, look into trusts and things like that to help protect your assets. Money goes real fast in a situation like this.

Finally, get along with your siblings (if you’re lucky enough to have them). One day, they will be the only ‘family’ you have left (besides the one you started – you get the drift). And when you can work together with them, in a peaceful, loving way, it can make a crappy situation a whooooooole lot easier. (Love you buddy πŸ˜‰)

Holy moly! Never thought I’d be talking about this stuff! But here we are! Don’t want to be all depressing!!! Just want to throw out somethings to think about! I never would have thought about any of these things if our life wasn’t turned upside down! Have a good one! 😘

PS – look at little man in the yard today. Poor Squirt! LOL.



13 thoughts on “10/11

  1. Diane Weston says:

    Great points Dana! Love Love Love the picture!

  2. Sharon Creveling says:

    Sucks getting old/growing up, huh? With the work I’ve done in the past, I’ve been trying to stress all of this as often as possible. (I remember all too well how my Mom freaked out when I talked to her about organ donation when I was 17 and started driving.) But the importance of preparation can’t be stressed enough. And YES, our healthcare system is completely FUBAR’d. Too many people don’t see the atrocities (mostly because they are too wrapped up in their own lives to care about what’s happening to others) until they are directly affected by it. We are all connected. We are all one. It’s really time people start paying attention to that. Our actions (or lack thereof) have MAJOR ramifications on the lives of others. It’s sad that tragedy is almost ‘needed’ to wake people up. The good news… GREAT news is… when someone as loved as your Mom is affected, people take notice. And stuff gets done. πŸ™‚ ❀

  3. Cc says:

    Great advice and tips! They are things you hear over and over but don’t always act upon. Thanks for looking out for all of us as sharing what you have learned. ! That pic was a good way to end this post! Hope Linda has a better day tomorrow!

  4. Karen Hoch says:

    Hi I am a friend of Steph’s…there is a patients right to know law in PA call one of your local representatives and get them involved in helping you get records etc….also if they throw at you “charges” they cannot charge you anymore than you would regular pay….also for feeding, there is a thickener you can buy at CVS for feeding, been there, done that. Tell Steph to call her “legal beagle” she’ll know who and ask her for help for records….keep your sense of humor…

    • Dana Miller says:

      This is great to know! Thank you so much. They want to charge me 20 something bucks right off the bat, then like 1.25 or something ridiculous a page! You say they can’t do that? Ohhhh. This is good stuff! 😊

  5. Sam Wolf says:

    I saw this for the first time today and I’m extremely impressed on how you are handling all of this Dana. It takes a special person to do all of this and I know you aren’t doing this to listen to all of the nice things people say about you. But they are true. I haven’t read everything you have written and would like to know if LInda is seeing visitors at Phoebe. Thank-you.

  6. Laura Luca says:

    Hey Buddy! Thanks for all of the advice! Everything you said is so true and we never think this stuff can happen to us. Glad your momma was okay today! Love ya!!! xoxo

  7. Marianne Dogmanits says:

    Just want you to know something….I would not have been able to handle what you are handling at your age!!! I barely handled it in my late 50’s. You are so right tho. Don’t feel bad about expressing your feelings about the being really poor or really rich. I have been a nurse for 40 yrs and it is so true. I could add several more adjectives describing those that get things “free” but I am sure I would be called racist. The system is milked to it’s limit by many that don’t deserve it. It is like an overgrown garden full of weeds.
    Great job..you are right on!!

  8. Andrea says:

    Great advice. Cry every time I read your posts. I am in complete awe of your strength and positive spirit. Your family is super lucky to have you. Looking forward to seeing you at the breakfast.

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