Just wanted to tell everyone how incredible my Mom is (just in case you didn’t already know 😉). I always ask her questions, like are you happy, do you have any questions or concerns you want to talk about, anything on your mind…yada yada. Well the other day we got to talking and it came up – Mom, are you happy to still be here. She said, meaning am I happy to be alive? She said of course! She said she worries a lot that the old her is gone, and I said I do too a little bit. She then told me she never watches religious shows but one was on the TV. While watching the show, she felt like it was meant for her to see. She realized, even in this less than ideal situation, it could still always be worse. (Are you kidding me I thought! She’s sitting in a nursing home at 57, missing half her skull, paralyzed, in ‘briefs’ while her daughter is selling her home…). And then she said, instead of sitting her saying why me why me, she said, I say why NOT me. And it felt as if i was hit with a ton of bricks. Just when I thought I could be any more proud of her or love her ANY more – I am and I do. I don’t know if she will ever be the same lady that I was lucky enough to have as my Mom for 32 years, and boy was I lucky, but I was fortunate enough to know that the entire time. I had/have a very special relationship with Mom that I pray my daughter and I will have some day. But this new lady, whose soft spoken, doesn’t really laugh or cry, that tells a couple jokes here and there but is pretty tired and doesn’t really say I love you that much, is even more incredible that my ‘old’ Mom. I also pray that I get to spend the next 32 years and then some getting to know her. She is so amazing and inspiring – I am in awe of her and her strength. Which is why I’m still hear. Somedays it feels like I’m fighting the entire universe with the weight of the world on my shoulders – and then I call her phone just to listen to her voicemail, and I am instantly reminded that she is worth every single second.
Today the kids, Memaw and I celebrated. Nothing in particular! Just being here really – together. And it was a blast. A balloon and a huge bag of goodies from the dollar store! She smiled the entire time – a big ol’ happy ear to ear smile! So did I, and the kids! It was great and for a moment, nothing else seemed to matter. 😊Here is a little collage of the fun we had.